Before You Speak

This past week I was preparing for our mid-week Bible study and the Lord placed on my heart a couple of hard concepts and a perplexing question:

1. You will speak what is in your heart (Matthew 12:34)
2. Your heart is deceitful and cannot be trusted (Jeremiah 17:9)
3. Well then, how do I control my speech?!

There must be a way! Can we tame it, teach it to be better? James 3 says that no person can do this...well that is a bit discouraging, and yet we are called to, as believers in Christ, have speech that honors Him and encourages one another (Colossian 4:6, Ephesians 4:29).

Gossip

I know from personal experience that one thing all humans struggle with is gossip, speaking about other people when they are not present. It is often passing comments but even small words hold weighty thoughts and emotions. Do we ever question the impact of our words not just on the subject but also on the person we are speaking to? Have you ever wondered if your speech about others effects how the person you're speaking to sees you? How often are we found to be hypocrites by silly, thoughtless speech? During the study another convicting passage came up...

Careless Words

"I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified and by your words you will be condemned." (Jesus) 
~Matthew 12:36-37

Uhhh...YIKES! Can anyone say ouch?! EVERY CARLESS WORD...I don't know about you but I would be in a lot of trouble if it were not for Jesus' saving grace. However, that does not exempt me from being responsible for my speech on this side of my salvation story! We do not have a free pass as believers to say what we want, we are called to a higher standard, called to be a witness and example of Christ in this world.

You may have heard the old phrases "preach the Gospel and if you have to, say something" or "actions speak louder than words." Both have valid points, but don't miss the fact that in order for the Gospel to be heard it must first be spoken AND words can quickly damage any witness you have made with someone who doesn't know the grace and mercy of Christ. Your speech, your tongue, is powerful and can be amazingly destructive and, unfortunately, untamable on our own.

So again I ask, what can we do?!

The Tongue and The Heart

How do we solve this problem of "the tongue?" If our speech comes from the overflow of our heart and our heart is untrustworthy, can we get a new heart? Can it be replaced? Made new?

YES!!!!

"And I will give them a new heart to know Me, that I am the LORD: and they shall be my people, and I will be their God: for they shall return unto me with their whole heart." ~Jeremiah 24:7
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." ~2 Corinthians 5:17

Praise God for His provision, He has made a way for us! Let us receive as those IN CHRIST the gift of a new heart, a new creation. He has also given us tools to fill ourselves with His thoughts, focus on higher and better things, to crowd out the "old self" so there is no room for it to control speech any more. He also will also help us in guarding our mouths if we ask Him (I suggest really praying over Psalm 141 if you struggle with speech as I do).

I'll end with a useful acronym that hopefully will applicable for you...

Before you speak:

• T - is this true? (Philippians 4:8)
• H - is this helpful? (Ephesians 4:29)
• I - is this inspiring? (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
• N - is this necessary? (Proverbs 17:27)
• K - is this kind? (Colossians 4:6)

I hope this encourages you to know that even though it seems so hopeless to try to restrain your tongue on your own, the Lord has the power to change you and sanctify you to be more like Himself each day! Keep going and don't be discouraged when you stumble, get back up and finish the race He has prepared for you.

-Katey Hight

Check out Sneakers & Phylacteries for more from Katey!

Taming the Text

Before Andrea had so much as given the introduction of the lesson in class on Sunday, I knew I was in for more “ouch” than “amen”.  You see, she was talking about the power of the tongue and I just happen to have a chronic case of MMD (Motor-mouth Disorder).  I have seen time and again the healing and the destruction that can be produced by the things we say. 

But what about the things that we communicate without saying a word?  What about the words that we type?  While the words we say with our mouths are incredible powerful, the words we form in other media can be equally impactful for good or bad.  So much of modern communication is through text and email.  Even though we may be using our thumbs, all the same issues of the tongue still apply, or to put it another way…

Out of the overflow of the heart, the thumbs type.

Most of us can text about as fast as we can type on a keyboard or even talk, for that matter.  And we have these handy little devices that allow us to instantly speak our mind to anyone and everyone, no matter what mood we are in, with absolutely no cooling off period.  The results of this hastiness, however, can last long after we press “Send”.

For instance, just this week a text I sent to a coworker could have been a case-study in hasty, argumentative, know-it-all communication.  And now because I had to prove I was right to the other know-it-all, the relationship is now strained.  Someone whom I have been praying for opportunities to share Christ with has now seen the icky overflow of my know-it-all, insecure heart instead of seeing Jesus in me.

Social media-our text message to the world.

If you think that the words you say with your mouth and can only be perceived by those within hearing distance is powerful, think of the impact of your social media accounts.  What among our daily stream-of-consciousness babble is building others up, tearing others down, or causing someone to stumble?

The tongue can’t be tamed, our words in whatever form can’t be tamed, so what are we supposed to do?  Just as Andrea spoke about in the lesson, no amount of self-help techniques will give you power over your tongue.  This can only be done with the help of the Holy Spirit, who is freely given to all those who believe in the saving work of Jesus Christ on the cross.

Please be praying with me this week…

Lord, please tame our tongues and our texts.  Please let the words that flow from us be kind, true, and necessary.  Let anything we say or communicate glorify You and make your name revered among those who interact us.  We pray that your Spirit would flow through us and speak life into those around us.  It is only by the power of the blood of Christ that we are even able to come to you at all.  We love You, Lord.  Amen.

-Renee Moreland

Fearfully and Wonderfully (Not Frightfully & Weirdly) Made

“13 For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb.

14 I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well.

15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret,

And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;

16 Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were written all

The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.”

Psalm 139:13-16

Fearfully and wonderfully made… these are probably two of the hardest words in the whole Bible for me to believe about myself.  The First Book of Renee reads differently, it says frightfully and weirdly made. 

But as we walk through these verses we’ve heard a million times, lets actually take a moment to let them sink in…

“For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb.”

Really?  Even that thing that made me weirdly short, or tall, or fat, or thin, or plain? 

Yep.

“I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;  Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows that full well”

We were made both fragile (fearfully) and amazingly resilient and complex (wonderfully).  Then we are reminded, just in case we forgot, that the Lord’s works are wonderful.  Everything He does is good, including how he made you.  Even the complexity in a single human cell is enough to merit praising God for his creativity.

“My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;”

Even the circumstances of our birth, whether they be common, miraculous, or traumatic, even then God knew us and was knitting together chromosomes to make you exactly the person you were meant to be.

Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were written all the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them.”

Even the experiences we’ve had and the moments that defined us, even the days that have yet to define us, the Lord already knew about them before we took that first gasp of breath.

So who are you going to believe? Yourself and your anxious, self-conscious thoughts, or the holy, inspired Word of God? 

Take a moment right now to meditate on these verses and let God's Word soak into all those cracks in you heart that insecurity is keeping wedged open.

And the next time that self-loathing thoughts invade, let’s remember that God formed us the way we are ON PURPOSE and He’s pretty convinced that He did a good job.  

-Renee Moreland

Forgiveness Is Not Forgetting

Too often I have listened to a lesson on forgiveness and have felt the weight of guilt and condemnation (forgiveness-guilt if you will). Lies from the enemy creep in and whisper "you're not over it...what they did still stings so you couldn't have forgiven them...you aren't friends with them any more so how can you think you forgave them..."  Deep within my heart I know I forgave them, I remember the long and painful process, but something still lingers, something still hurts, still festers when "that person/situation" arises yet again. Am I alone...does no one else ever feel this way?

Where did we get the saying "forgive and forget?" It is ridiculous! That isn't how the human brain works. Our powerful, beautiful brain remembers things, especially hurts. There is no DELETE button, no magic function to erase what we have gone through. And, encouragingly enough, it isn't a biblical command. Yes, we are called to forgive, but the God that made our brain and wired it perfectly did not grant us the ability to forget. WHY? Maybe it is for protection, to learn from hurts of our past, to grow and mature beyond them. Maybe it is to remind us that no human is perfect, that we are all sinful and fallible creatures. Whatever the reason, I have had to learn and relearn that forgetting does not automatically accompany forgiveness. And I am thankful for the godly men and women who have taught and counseled me through seasons of both unforgiveness and forgiveness-guilt.

"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."
-Ephesians 4:32

I recently went to a small bible study where Marty Sholars, a Christian counselor, spoke on forgiveness. She gave so many valuable insights into biblical forgiveness but the one that brought tears to my eyes was "forgiveness is not forgetting." She spoke of the imagery of a scar. In cold weather the skin around a scar can tighten causing tenderness in the area. That tenderness was not a sign of a wound but of the fact that the wound was healed and no longer bleeding. She also spoke of what Jesus showed the disciples when He visited after His resurrection...HIS SCARS! Proof of who He was and what He went through on our behalf. Proof that He loved us enough to sit on that cross and die for our salvation and His glory. 

WOW, bring on the misty eyes! I can honestly say there have been two distinct instances in my life where I felt betrayed by people I loved and cared for and I described the emotional pain they caused as being cut open. Betrayal in friendship, to me, is much like two people sewn together in a strong bond and having that bond ripped apart. Graphic I know but I think the people we hold the closest are the ones that have the potential to cause the most damage, the largest wounds that take forever to heal and leave the biggest scars. In both cases we reconciled (hold on, we'll get to this concept) our friendship and again I was hurt, our friendship was damaged and eventually ended. I worked through forgiveness in counseling and have been praying for them for years now (please don't read that as boasting, it is still hard to pray for them but the Lord softens my heart to them every time I do).

And still the scars tighten and are tender when those people enter into my life. I don't know if that will ever go away or if I will ever be called to be in a relationship with either person again but I know this, my scars are a sign of healing from God alone. I never want to harm their reputation nor do I wish any ill towards them. The Lord helped me to forgive them of what they did to me and He forgave me for my ugly heart towards them after being hurt. 

"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive other their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."
-Matthew 6:14-15

The other topic that spoke to me was how she distinguished reconciliation versus forgiveness. Forgiveness is between you and God, sometimes the person who hurt you has no idea they did so. Sometimes it is not appropriate or necessary to point out the hurt they caused. And sometimes it is not an option if the person is no longer with you. Many times during depression people hurt me who had no intention of hurting me, simply because of the way my brain reacted to things people did or said. I had to forgive over and over my misunderstandings and anger towards people who had no idea what I heard and felt in their words and actions. 

Forgiveness frees up our hearts to receive God's grace and conviction. It takes the weight of justice off of us and puts it onto God, who is the only righteous and just judge.

"If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying 'I repent,' you must forgive them." - Luke 17:3-4 (emphasis added)

Reconciliation is between you and another person. It allows the hurt to be known, addressed, forgiven and the relationship mended to continue. But when that covenant is broken again and again it may be that person is not good for you or you may not be called to reconcile if they show no remorse/repentance for their actions. BUT, forgiveness is never an option, it is always commanded and always blessed. Do not stand between God and that person thinking that your forgiveness will somehow condone their behavior. God alone will do the work of conviction and justice, you need only forgive and step aside. As my teacher Andrea said this week, "tattle on them" and then pray for them. Lift them up to the Lord and ask that He do work only He can do, change hearts and mature believers.

I hope that encourages you to free up your heart from unforgiveness and from forgiveness-guilt. The Lord will never condemn you but He will bring conviction, learn to tell the difference and at all times pour out your heart to Him. Tattle to the Lord on those who have hurt you, forgive them, pray for them...then write down the date you forgave them and when Satan tries to make you think you haven't forgiven them, pull out that date and remind yourself of the faithfulness of God who walked with you through the healing process.

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they sall be comforted." -Matthew 5:4

-Katey Hight

Sneakers & Phylacteries 

http://sneakersandphylacteries.blogspot.com/?m=1

What's Holding You Back?

Ephesians 3: 20-21 states, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.” Do you believe it? Better yet are you ready to achieve the goodness that God wants to lavish on your life?

When I read through His word I see and feel his promises.  I’m filled with excitement by the truths that God declares he will be able to do in us and through us because of his mighty power. Sometimes, I have to stop and wonder though what’s holding me back from living the life that God has called me too? What are the road blocks that prevent us from receiving, believing, and achieving the goodness God has for us? Let’s take a look at 3 stumbling blocks.

• DOUBT “Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake.  When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus.  But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down.  Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”  Peter asked God to tell him to come.  Peter got out of the boat and did exactly that.  However, when he saw trouble, turmoil, and trials he lost sight of God’s great power.  How many times do you doubt God’s great power?

• FEAR – For me fear is like a forest. It starts out as an ever so innocent seed. A thought of “I’m a little scared” sometimes it grows from a previous experience. If this seed is not uprooted it grows, it grows into a tall tree, it builds upon itself reaching higher and higher. Eventually one day I look around and find myself in a forest of fear. Its dark, it’s cold, and there is no light. It’s almost as bad as living in a cave. Fear prevents me from living in the light and it hinders me from moving forward.  When I feel my fear factor building in around me I think of David.
  

  “As he was talking with them, Goliath, the Philistine champion from Gath, stepped out from his lines and shouted his usual defiance, and David heard it.  Whenever the Israelites saw the man, they all fled from him in great fear.” 1 Samuel 17:23-24. “David said to the Philistine, “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.  This day the Lord will deliver you into my hands, and I’ll strike you down and cut off your head. As the Philistine moved closer to attack him, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him.  Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground.” 1 Samuel 17:45-46, 48-49.” 

How many times do we forget that we come against our strongholds with the name of the Lord Almighty on our side?

• LAZINESS - I’ll start that diet tomorrow, I’ll do my quiet time in the morning, I’ll begin researching about new jobs next week when life slows down.  The strong holds of laziness tells us that we can always do it tomorrow, next week, or in a few days.  It calls us to be sedentary.  Life doesn’t begin sitting still and things don’t get accomplished by not doing anything.  

Can you identify your biggest road block? Ask God to give you discerment to recognize it, strength to overcome it, and courage to never allow it to be a stumbling block again for we are God's worksmanship created to do good things which God prepared in advance for us to do. “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” (Ephesians 2:10) 

So long roadblocks, it’s time to pass you by!  

-Rebecca Search

-Originally posted on Rebecca's Blog, Searching for Joy

Forgiveness Starts With You

Forgiveness…it’s hard to give, it’s hard to receive but in the end it can be life changing! I have recently been going through a study and one week we focused completely on forgiveness! With one step, forgiveness can take away all of the rubble that has been left behind from ship wrecks and can ultimately change our lives and the direction we are heading!

But how am I supposed to forgive them for this horrible thing? We must first start at ground zero – with you. We are not perfect people – yet God gives us an endless supply of forgiveness!

Conviction
Have mercy on me, Lord, for I am in distress. My sight is blurred because of my tears. My body and soul are withering away. I am dying from grief; my years are shortened by sadness. Misery has drained my strength; I am wasting away from within. Psalm 31:9-l0
You must first acknowledge and know that you are a sinful person (as are we all) that needs the grace of Christ Jesus – our Savoir!

Confession:
Oh Lord, do not rebuke me in your anger or discipline me in your rage. Have compassion on me, Lord, for I am weak. Heal me, Lord, for my body is in agony. I am sick at heart…I am worn out from sobbing. Every night tears drench my bed; my pillow is wet from weeping. My vision is blurred with grief. Psalm 6:1-3, 6-7a
You must identify what is the truth and what is right --straight in the face, then you must confess your sin to God. God knows everything about us before it happens (Psalm 139:16) – but He wants us to confess it and hand it over to Him.

Repentance:
But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong. 1 John 1:9
Once you have confessed you sin – you can’t go right back to doing that sin! You must repent of your sin and turn away from it to face the Lord (Psalm 34:5).

Acknowledgment of Authority:
I – yes, I alone – am the one who blots out your transgressions for my own sake and will remember them no more. Isaiah 43:25
You must know and truly believe in your heart of hearts that the death of Jesus has paid the price of our sin – you must believe that because of that ultimate sacrifice that was made that ALL of your sins are forgiven through his blood (Isaiah 1:18).

Request for Forgiveness:
People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy. Proverbs 28:13
This is the easy part – ask the Lord for forgiveness – you just have to do this once and then it is wiped away – and in His eyes like it never happened (Jeremiah 31:34).

Acceptance of Forgiveness:
I have swept away your sins like the morning mists. I have scattered your offences like the clouds. Oh, return to me, for I have paid the price to set you free. Isaiah 44:22
You do it once. Then that’s it right? For God – yes, for you – it might take some work to have peace about it. There was one year that I was struggling with something that I had done. I knew that I must confess it and hand it over to God and ask for forgiveness. I felt the weight of my sin lifted from me Easter 2012 when I was at the Maundy Thursday service at my local church, but I still have to remind myself that I am forgiven and that Christ has made the sacrifice to pay for my sin – oh what a precious gift to be given!

Forgiveness of Others:
If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14-15
Forgiveness is a flowing process – we receive forgiveness from God – so we must allow that forgiveness to flow through us out to others. We are given an endless amount of forgiveness – to a point that it is overflowing to those around us – we gotta let it flow! We must forgive as we have been forgiven (Matthew 6:12).

An excerpt from Beth Moore's Jesus, the One and Only:

We have a sin problem. We are powerless to help ourselves. Give the right set of circumstances and the wrong state of mind, each of us is capable of just about anything.

I can remember being so devastated over a sin I had allowed to ensnare me that I repeatedly begged God to forgive me. I was repentant the very first time I begged; I confessed my sin with great sorrow and turned radically from it. Still, I continued to plead for forgiveness.

One day God spoke to my heart and said: “Beth, my child, you have an authority problem. You think you can do your part, which is to repent. You just don’t think I can do my part, which is to forgive.”

I was stunned. I began to realize that my sin of unbelief was as serious as my prior sin of rebellion. I wept and repented for my failure to credit Him. With the authority He possessed to forgive my sins. It was eye opening.

My constant re-confessions did not bring me relief. They only made me more miserable and filled me with self-loathing. Relief came when I decided to take God at His Word.

If you have truly repented – which means you have experienced godly sorrow and a subsequent detour from the sin – bathe yourself in the river of God’s forgiveness. Christ has authority to forgive sins right here on earth, you don’t have to wait until heaven. You can experience the freedom of complete forgiveness right here, right now. Fall under Christ’s authority and accept His grace. You’ve been paralyzed long enough, child of God. Hear Him say to you this day: “Friend, your sins are forgiven…I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home.” Luke 5:20, 24

Go out and live in the freedom that God has given us with His forgiveness! Once you have accepted His forgiveness and are walking in the freedom you have received from Him, you will have an overflow of grace to forgive those who have wronged you.

-Megan Polis

The Struggle

While Christians in the Mideast are giving up their lives for the sake of Christ, I am met with the realization that daily I am sometimes unwilling to give up even the little temptations that I know hold back the ability of the Spirit to work through me.  This causes me to wonder, would I give up my last breath, too?  And the obligatory self-loathing ensues.  In Romans 7:19-25, Paul launched into one brain-bender of a pity party, too:

“For I do not do the good that I want to do, but I practice the evil that I do not want to do.  Now if I do what I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but it is the sin that lives in me.  So I discover this principle: When I want to do what is good, evil is with me.  For in my inner self I joyfully agree with God’s law.  But I see a different law in the the parts of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and taking me prisoner to the law of sin in the parts of my body.  What a wretched man I am!  Who will rescue me from this dying body?  I thank God through Christ Jesus our Lord!  So then, with my mind I myself am a slave to the law of God, but with my flesh to the law of sin."

Clearly this man who DID go on to give his life up for the cause of Christ is STRUUUUGGLING with a capital UGH and evidently dealt with a “thorn in the flesh” along the way. (2 Cor 12:7-9)

Cue “The Accuser”… as if we didn’t already feel bad enough on our own, Satan roams about seeking whom he may destroy with his “special set of skills” which includes accusing believers before God and everybody, day and night. (Rev. 12: 10)  As we know, most lies contain a nugget of truth, otherwise no one would ever fall for them.  So the Father of Lies (the Devil) takes our screw-up(s) and proceeds to convince us that we are disqualified from being useful for Christ because of them.  If not forever, he at least makes us to feel that we need to sit in the penalty box for a bit before God can use us again.  The dirt has to wear off of our hands with time before we can be made clean enough to handle things like the Word of God and prayer, or so we think.  But the truth is that through the saving work of Christ, we are as clean as the freshly fallen snow!

Confession and repentance are necessary parts of our walk and growing in Him but our qualification as servants of the Most High God has nothing to do with us and EVERYTHING to do with the completed work of Christ on the cross. Just in case we were uncertain, he even said on the cross, “It is finished” to prevent any confusion. (John 19:30)

So what?  What does this mean to us moving forward? How does this play out in real life? What can I do when I feel defeated in this cycle of failure? 

1) Restart your dialogue (prayer) with the Father immediately, if not sooner.  Repent (agree with God about your sin) if you haven’t already.

2) When thoughts invade and accuse, recognize their source, and let the enemy of your soul  know that you may have screwed up for the 786^th time, but the blood of Christ covers all your sins and has already paid the price for them.

3) Look for a way to turn your failure into a victory.  The Lord redeems our broken places and uses them for good.  He not only binds up the brokenhearted (Isaiah 61:1), he uses our brokenness to help others.  Kind of like today, when I screwed up for the 786^th time and God still allowed these words to flow through my hands, my weak, grimy, painfully human hands and into your heart, through the power of the Spirit, for His glory.  So look for a way that your experience can help someone else and so serve the body of Christ.

-Renee Moreland